An Immoralist’s Bucket List

I’m in one of those moods where the futility of self-restraint seems overwhelming. Why give up on flying when no-one else is? Let’s marinate the world in CO2 and let the bastard cook! And so what if people must work in conditions that I’d not consider for a second to produce my iPhone? No-one else cares enough to boycott them, so why should I.

Against that moral backdrop, let me indulge in that hoariest of exercises in self-interest: the bucket list. Other people be damned, and the consequences of my actions be doubly damned; here’s what I’d like to do before I die (in no particular order):

  1. Own a dog
  2. Run a full marathon.
  3. Climb Mount Kilimanjaro
  4. Visit all 50 of the United States.
  5. Get married.
  6. Become completely fluent in a second language.
  7. Go to every country on earth.
  8. Raise more than £5000 for a charity.
  9. Write my own programming language.
  10. Travel from London to Sydney overland.
  11. See Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony performed live.
  12. Visit the Smithsonian Air and Space Museum.
  13. Drink a bottle of Penfolds Grange Hermitage.
  14. Stand beneath the Milky Way somewhere perfectly dark.
  15. Stand beneath the Aurora Borealis.
  16. Attend the Grand Prix de Monaco.
  17. See a total solar eclipse.
  18. Chase a tornado.
  19. Read Marx’s Capital, Churchill’s History of the Second World War, and Tolstoy’s War and Peace.